30 Comments

Lovely writing, as always, Jenna. I had a tear in my eye as this will be my reality next summer...preparing myself for what will pass in a blink, I am sure.

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This last year is a great year, Kate. So many memories will be made. Cherish them all.

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Thanks for sharing, as always, and your thoughts about home ring so true... reminds me of a book we read to our son, Home is a Window by Stephanie Ledyard. One of those picture books that kids will enjoy, but will make parents tear up!

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Oh, I want to look the book up - thank you for that suggestion!

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If I know anything (and that surely isn’t much) it’s escaping the city from time to time is your only hope of maintaining your sanity, and love of NYC which u capture so eloquently on re-entry.

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True that. And returning usually makes me appreciate living in NYC more — not always, but mostly:)

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Beautiful, beautiful narrative! As a new grandmother, I have felt a lot of what you’re feeling and more!! Those special days in Washington will carry you and your daughter through her whole freshman year, when she’s homesick, and when you’re missing her beyond words! you’ve inspired me !! I think I’m going to write some things today ! Thank you for sharing this, and enjoy the ride 😘💖

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Thank you, Deb! And congratulations on becoming a grandmother! I am touched that any of this inspired you and excited that it's motivated you to create today ❤️

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It’s funny because whenever I’m in NYC and I go back home, I’m a bit cranky for a few days until the Midwest suburbia has sucked out my will to live and I settle back into my reality. My bones need a city, the noise, the smell of humanity, people rushing around all over. My neighbors think I’m nuts because who would want that? I would… I grew up in urban chaos… I need it like I need air and water. But in the end, home is where your people are… still… someday, someday…

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That's why I returned nearly 30 years ago. It's true that NYC is just different. It's definitely not the easiest place to live and it's certainly expensive, and there are so many things I can complain about, but...despite what I wrote about home not being a place, it is home. It's the people, the energy, and all of the intangible stuff. Now, will I live here forever? That is still the question.

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An entirely unrelated comment, but a friend of mine has been doing this thing now probably going on as long as snapchat has been around... where at 12:34 (am and/or pm) he takes a snap of whatever he is doing, slugs it the time/date and posts... the rules are you must tag using the time, not fake it with a text tool... and if you miss it, you can only post at 12:35 BUT you must type Fuuuuuck! with the text tool. If it is already 12:36, you must wait for the next 12:34. He's now got probably several hundred of us doing this .... I only mention this because I just now noticed the time stamp on the notification of your like to my comment. 😀😀😀 12:34pm ... the screenshot will be part of my next 12:34 post...

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I love it. I love the constraints of this daily documentation. And I am honored to be part of your 12:34 post!

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I didn't expect this piece to hit on so many levels. Like you have mentioned, life got simplified in many ways when the kids grew up. Little did I know this was a phase. I was not expecting to read of seeing an ill relative for possibly the last time. Just last night, my ailing father stated he wants to go back to Asia to live out his last years....months perhaps. We just don't know. We have a very complicated relationship with my parents but the thought of suddenly seeing him for the last time as we drop him off on the other side of the world has really thrown me for an emotional loop. It's like the opposite of dropping one's child off at school or camp. The complexities of life. It's so hard. Thank you for reminding us that we have shared experiences and we are not alone.

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Hi Jeanne. A few years before my dad got really sick, there was some talk about him moving back to Korea. Most of his family is still there. My uncle just moved back this year. And many years ago I watched my grandmother say goodbye to her oldest daughter, when my aunt went back to Korea after a long visit. I remember it blowing my mind that this could have been their final goodbye (and it was). I think about all of this a lot. I wish you and your dad well, whichever way it goes. The "kids" often end up doing the leaving, but it is strange to think about this flip. All of this IS hard.

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Thank you for sharing that. I needed to read it. There's so much sacrifice in being both an immigrant and being the child of one. I thought I knew the majority but haha life says totally not! Thanks again xo

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It keeps surprising us, doesn't it? And yeah...I am feeling the whole "child of one" thing now. It feels like immense pressure to navigate an aging parent by myself.

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So, so beautiful! I feel like whatever change is happening to you this summer reflects so beautifully in your work. Your writing and photos have been a real treat, and inspiration too

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(And I said beautiful twice bc that’s how much I mean it!! 😆)

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Aw man, thank you. I really appreciate that 🥺. Sometimes I worry that I am way too overly sappy. But I guess that is who I am. 😬

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Not too sappy at all. Your kid(s) are going to look back at this so fondly!

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❤️🫶

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Beautiful writing x

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Thank you so much for reading, Rebecca 🫶

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The teenage parenting years bring out so many emotions in me. At times I'm ready to throw her out the door (just kidding, kind of!) and others are like what you have described, where we both know its the last time we'll do something. Beautifully captured. We also got sick on vacation, that sure is an experience.

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It's a rollercoaster for sure. Even now, just days and less than two weeks away before they leave, we are quibbling about things and getting on each other's nerves probably 😂

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Moving! I've thought about this idea of home but not in these terms. Whenever my wife and I travel, going back out hotel room always feel like going home. We live in Bangkok and so that's our home. When we travel back to India to visit our parents and the place we grew up we always say, "oh, we're going home for a week". I've always thought of it as the place of refuge/ comfort in the current context. But your definition probably does it more justice.

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Thank you for your comment. Home is all of those things too and I've referred to it in that way as well, but this trip has made me look at it from other perspectives and now I think of it more as a feeling than a physical place. It's tied to the memories of people, alive and those who have left us, and the feeling of security and comfort.

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💕🥹 I wish we lived closer, too! Hopefully I’ll see you in the spring and will drag you to Holy Cross cemetery and the Cloisters 😂 Love you.

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Maybe I should start asking "when are you going to move to the Hudson Valley?" like you've been asking when will I be moving back to Portland 😬❤️

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Funny I’m in NYC right now, waiting for a friend at the Seaport downtown, and I am so so happy to be visiting, home again, at least for a while

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