Don't ignore the signal flairs

Between hope and dread, catharsis and oppression. We're heading into what feels like the longest week of the year.

The markers of stress tend to manifest on three fingers on my right hand. Ever since I was a late teen, the intense itching from my psoriasis rises and falls like a barometer of the current news, my problems, and internal struggles both real and imagined.

If you know how maddening itchiness can be, then you can understand how good it feels, momentarily, to give in to that temptation to scratch. The paradox lies in how much relief you feel by doing the very act that is destructive to its healing. I’m an accomplice to the overproduction of cells that refuse to mature on my fingers, but instead flake off to expose the rawness underneath.

Less than a week till the election and it’s never been more clear that as a nation we’re living in two different realities. The proof was there last weekend, right here in the city I live in, in an arena that I’ve been to many times. Needless to say, my fingers are burning right now. Add to that, another chronic manifestation of stress that has surfaced again this week. I watch Michelle Obama’s impassioned plea not to ignore what’s at stake—not only for reproductive rights, but for women’s health in general, as I chug down my sixth glass of unsweetened cranberry juice.

It’s amazing how our bodies send up signal flairs in the air. It’s amazing how often we ignore them.

I don’t mean to harp on politics again (especially to non-U.S. readers, I apologize), but America feels like it’s spiraling into collective anxiety. But you wouldn’t necessarily know it if you walked outside and took in all the glory of October weather. Leaves are peaking in a dazzling display of fall, and Halloween revelry abounds. We clear our heads by taking walks because it’s so damn nice outside—maybe the nicest October we’ve had since as far back as I can remember. Beneath the beautiful weather lies the reality that it hasn’t rained even once this month. Halloween is predicted to be near 80 degrees in NYC. Neither of that is normal. The weather has been both delightful and unsettling.

On social platforms, the political discourse is in your face. Depending on what your algorithm serves you—though I suspect politics is hard to escape at this point—it’s election chatter all the time. We’re angry, we’re seething, and the rift dividing this country is so wide that the other side is no longer in sight. But no matter which side of the chasm you’re on, so much of our political views and how we vote is shaped by fear, not hope. The difference is what each side fears.

We vent on social media as a release because it would be exhausting if we were to vent to our friends or families like this in real life. I’m sure many of us just want to scream into the void. The algorithms serve what we’re liking and engaging, so we largely vent to an echo chamber. I liken it to scratching the itch. It can be either cathartic or oppressive. It’s the same whiplash we feel as we bounce between hope and dread.

At some point when you’re this angry, rage descends into sadness because rage is often a form of self-protection. It numbs the truth until that rage has nowhere left to go. Sadness creeps in when we realize there is no easy resolution. We all knew this election season would be contentious, but I’m not sure we anticipated how vitriolic and jaw dropping this openly hateful, misogynistic, and racist show of vulgarity could be. Tell me how you can spin this hate into something other than what it is. Tell me we’re not teetering dangerously close to an oligarchy.

This last week before the election has gotten really ugly. Don’t ignore the signal flairs. I hope you’re doing what you can to get through it because the next week will probably feel like the longest week of the year. And let’s brace for it. It will likely take much longer to know who will be sworn in come January.

In the meantime, I have a lot to look forward to before election day: Halloween in the neighborhood, a college visit weekend, my youngest’s 18th birthday (she turns 18 the day AFTER the election 🤦🏻‍♀️), and the NYC marathon. All wonderful and celebratory things. Life continues.

See you on the other side,
JP

Halloween is the best time of year in Brooklyn. Maybe a little too good. My kids used to get scared walking down particular streets when they were young. The creativity and effort involved in decorating for the holidays is second to none.

There used to be particular homeowners in our neighborhood who would turn their brownstone front yards into haunted houses and theaters, putting on shows from their living room windows.

My first empty nest Halloween. I’ll miss my kids and friends who’d come over after school to put on their costumes and organize and trade their candy.

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Drawing of the week

Trying something different. Super quick inky sketches, which is typically not my thing. I warned you that I might just draw cats.

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What I enjoyed this week

• “I disagree with Kamala’s position on the war in Gaza. How can I vote for her?” Here is my answer: (YouTube)
  I know many people, particularly Gen Z, are struggling with rallying around voting for Harris because of the U.S. government’s role on the war in Gaza. Bernie Sanders did a good thing here by being the voice of reason and speaking directly to Americans who are thinking of sitting out this election.

• Your life is not a story: why narrative thinking holds you back (Psyche)
  Our stories help us make sense of a chaotic world, but they can be harmful and restrictive. There’s a liberating alternative.
  Still chewing on this argument that narrative might limit our thinking and understanding of ourselves. “Living in a non-narrative way means rejecting a particular identity, and instead seeing life and meaning as a set of open choices.”

• Kindness and Sorrow (Short Reads)
  An essay on the kindness of strangers by Laurie Easter.

• We’re in the Golden Age of Garbage Clothing (The Walrus)
  Pilling sweaters, stretched-out socks, flimsy denim. What happened to good garments?

• How light tells you when to sleep, focus and poo (The Conversation)
  A fascinating series on how light affects our mental and physical health. This article explains how the timing of light rules our circadian clock.

• Painting a Path Across the Stars (Cosmorama)
  A short story flash fiction on the act of creation by Kyle Tam.