I have a similar house in my heart, except it's by a lake, not by the sea/a strait - we saw the sun set from the dining room, with a light similar to two of your pictures and one side of the table would squint throughout diner. It's no longer in the family, but we still visit and I very much belong there.
On a lighter note, if NYC too would pay you for your promotion of the city, you could take early retirement!
Ha! I'm sort of in early retirement, but not because of the blog which I never really made money off of, but for health reasons. But yes, when the kids were young, we took full advantage of the city and did so many things. It sounds exhausting now 😅.
I’ve had the same thing on a smaller scale…A few years ago, my partner left in a way that even though he said he was coming back, I was pretty sure he wasn’t. I immediately packed all traces of him into boxes, and my mother was shocked when she visited a few days later. I told her that if he returned, it would be easily enough to make adjustments. He never returned.🤷🏾♀️
As an aside, I visit Western Washington every year, sometimes twice a year, and always spend time on the Olympic Peninsula yet haven’t found my way to Hama Hama. This will be the year!
I'm sorry to hear about your partner 😞. On a lighter note, a quick tip about Hama Hama. Reservations for the week pretty much sell out within 30-40 minutes when they open on Mondays at 9am, but those are for the covered sheds which do come with two dozen oysters. If you come at opening or don't want the included oysters, there are walk-ins available and as far as I could see, there was plenty of seating around.
“There’s often a purge that accompanies periods of transition that life-altering. I can attest to the restless urge of wanting to scrub everything in sight and deliberate over every object in the home”.
This is very relatable. I lost my father this past spring and in addition to having to declutter and go through his things, I have been doing the same with my own items. It is sadness mixed with a bit of catharsis 🌿
I can relate so much to this urge! In fact, a couple of years ago when I lost my furry family over the summer, I discovered this beautiful show that Amy Poehler did -- it is so beautiful and heart-lifting! https://www.imdb.com/title/tt19401412/
Mine isn’t a loss but a time to let some of the Knick knacks go. I have lived in my house for eight years. An east coast move to Texas. There were boxes that we are starting to open. And there are things, nice thought they are, are going to our thrift store, it is time.
Thanks for continuing to share and write your thoughts. The last two paragraphs really pulled at the heart strings. I’m teary eyed right now. Enjoy your trip and time with the family.
First of all, a scoop of ice cream for $7?? And here I am complaining about a €1.80 scoop.
It's interesting to read about how your mum cleaned out fast, and your MIL has rearranged or made some changes in the house. When my dad passed away more than 2 years ago, my mother did nothing. Basically, nothing. When I return home for a long-planned visit half a year after his death, my husband and I did some of the purging—donate, trash, and distribute some to relatives. Since my dad stayed in my studio in KL, we cleaned that out, but a lot remains unchanged in my childhood home. I still find his things in random drawers or even corners. Personally, I find this more horrifying—how is my mum coping? Is she coping by not doing anything? By living the same as before? By seeing his things but not seeing it? Granted, they've been living apart mostly anyway, but still...
Rachel, everyone has their own process to cope with grief. I am guessing this was your mother's way. Some people might find it paralyzing and I can totally understand why. I didn't expect anything less from my mother, given her personality, life experience, and their marriage. Clearing the house has been my mother-in-law's big hurdle and I commend her for tackling this enormous task. Maybe your mother is comforted by seeing his things?
I’m about to make a jump to the other side of the Atlantic (where summer days start at 3am and don’t end until past 11pm) and I feel the urge to take almost nothing with me. I want to purge it all. I’m being told that is irrational, but I don’t think it is.
Your writing really took me to the Pacific Northwest. So satisfying - especially the tasting of the oysters, when I can't travel far these days. Thank you!
I have a similar house in my heart, except it's by a lake, not by the sea/a strait - we saw the sun set from the dining room, with a light similar to two of your pictures and one side of the table would squint throughout diner. It's no longer in the family, but we still visit and I very much belong there.
On a lighter note, if NYC too would pay you for your promotion of the city, you could take early retirement!
Ha! I'm sort of in early retirement, but not because of the blog which I never really made money off of, but for health reasons. But yes, when the kids were young, we took full advantage of the city and did so many things. It sounds exhausting now 😅.
I am sorry, i didnt réalise it was for health réabonnement!
Reasons- French autocorrect ;)
☺️
I’ve had the same thing on a smaller scale…A few years ago, my partner left in a way that even though he said he was coming back, I was pretty sure he wasn’t. I immediately packed all traces of him into boxes, and my mother was shocked when she visited a few days later. I told her that if he returned, it would be easily enough to make adjustments. He never returned.🤷🏾♀️
As an aside, I visit Western Washington every year, sometimes twice a year, and always spend time on the Olympic Peninsula yet haven’t found my way to Hama Hama. This will be the year!
I'm sorry to hear about your partner 😞. On a lighter note, a quick tip about Hama Hama. Reservations for the week pretty much sell out within 30-40 minutes when they open on Mondays at 9am, but those are for the covered sheds which do come with two dozen oysters. If you come at opening or don't want the included oysters, there are walk-ins available and as far as I could see, there was plenty of seating around.
Jenna, reading this made my ❤️ swell.
❤️ Thanks for reading, Angie.
“There’s often a purge that accompanies periods of transition that life-altering. I can attest to the restless urge of wanting to scrub everything in sight and deliberate over every object in the home”.
This is very relatable. I lost my father this past spring and in addition to having to declutter and go through his things, I have been doing the same with my own items. It is sadness mixed with a bit of catharsis 🌿
I'm so sorry for your loss Mackenzie. Decluttering and purging is such an important part of the grieving and healing process, I think.
I can relate so much to this urge! In fact, a couple of years ago when I lost my furry family over the summer, I discovered this beautiful show that Amy Poehler did -- it is so beautiful and heart-lifting! https://www.imdb.com/title/tt19401412/
Yes, I've been seeing this phrase over and over. It's very much in our collective consciousness, I think.
Mine isn’t a loss but a time to let some of the Knick knacks go. I have lived in my house for eight years. An east coast move to Texas. There were boxes that we are starting to open. And there are things, nice thought they are, are going to our thrift store, it is time.
Oh yes, that too. We can hang onto things for far too long. Someone else can enjoy them - they'll have a second life!
I love love love this essay. Thank you for sharing!
🥰 Thank you, Chelsea.
Thanks for continuing to share and write your thoughts. The last two paragraphs really pulled at the heart strings. I’m teary eyed right now. Enjoy your trip and time with the family.
🥺 Aw, thank you so much for reading. Appreciate the comment here.
First of all, a scoop of ice cream for $7?? And here I am complaining about a €1.80 scoop.
It's interesting to read about how your mum cleaned out fast, and your MIL has rearranged or made some changes in the house. When my dad passed away more than 2 years ago, my mother did nothing. Basically, nothing. When I return home for a long-planned visit half a year after his death, my husband and I did some of the purging—donate, trash, and distribute some to relatives. Since my dad stayed in my studio in KL, we cleaned that out, but a lot remains unchanged in my childhood home. I still find his things in random drawers or even corners. Personally, I find this more horrifying—how is my mum coping? Is she coping by not doing anything? By living the same as before? By seeing his things but not seeing it? Granted, they've been living apart mostly anyway, but still...
Rachel, everyone has their own process to cope with grief. I am guessing this was your mother's way. Some people might find it paralyzing and I can totally understand why. I didn't expect anything less from my mother, given her personality, life experience, and their marriage. Clearing the house has been my mother-in-law's big hurdle and I commend her for tackling this enormous task. Maybe your mother is comforted by seeing his things?
It might be. I did ask her, but she never really answered me. Now that years have passed, she does seem oblivion to the unmoved things.
I’m about to make a jump to the other side of the Atlantic (where summer days start at 3am and don’t end until past 11pm) and I feel the urge to take almost nothing with me. I want to purge it all. I’m being told that is irrational, but I don’t think it is.
I don't think it's irrational at all. And it also sounds practical. It's probably a pain to move so much stuff overseas!
Gosh I loved this one. Beautiful!
Your writing really took me to the Pacific Northwest. So satisfying - especially the tasting of the oysters, when I can't travel far these days. Thank you!